Did you find this answer helpful? Subscribe to keep up with all things Lifelong Learning.
My 12 year old talks about spending lots of time with friends at school, is involved in the swim team after school and generally seems happy but, she never asks to see friends outside of school or on the weekends like other kids her age that I know. Is it okay to just hang at home outside of school and sports or should I be encouraging (read pushing) her to visit with her friends afterschool and on the weekends?
First, I commend you for being attuned to your child's well-being and social emotional health! The most compelling comment in our question was that your child generally seems happy. That's good news! It seems that your child's social relationships and other engagements are contributing to her positive mental health. You mention that she has solid relationships in school and is involved with extracurricular activities. Those are positive signs! Those relationships and engagements may be enough to fulfill her social and activity needs. Many children need down time to themselves and/or to engage with their family during evenings and weekends. If she generally seems content being solo or spending time with family when home, there is likely no need to worry. However, if you feel that you need an additional appraisal of her social interactions and skills, I would encourage you to consider making an informal inquiry to her school counselor or teachers. You may wish to ask about how she gets along with others and whether they have any concerns about her ability to make and sustain friendships. There is value in having the skills to entertain oneself and to find peace without constant activities. Celebrate these assets in your daughter and continue your good efforts to stay attuned to her well-being.
